Tuesday, April 16, 2013
I’m sorry it has been so long since my last entry.
Sometimes the Path of Pain must be walked alone…..
Just the way it is, I am afraid.
I had a dream last night that might illuminate where I am currently at.
I was a fireman trapped in a burning building.
I had all of my gear on, and was stuck on the 15th floor.
I went down the smoky hallway and looked out the window
And could see the flames engulfing the floors below me.
Far, far below on the street, I could see the flashing lights of
The fire truck and the scurrying ants that were men.
Smoke billowed up into the sky,
Growing in thickness as each floors windows blew out
And sacrificed their contents to the fiery feast.
There were other people in the burning building with me,
Others trapped in this same holocaust,
But there was little I could do to save them,
And nothing I could do to save myself.
Helpless and burdened with the knowledge
That everyone in this building was doomed,
I reached out put my gloved hand on the glass
And counted as each floor gavr up its occupants
As living sacrifices to the flames…..
Each level blowing out a last gasp of agony
Into the shining shards that then crashed into the street below.
I could feel it through the glass.
I could feel it getting closer.
I could feel the glass itself getting more brittle and hot
As the flames got closer, and closer…..
Far below me, away from the lights and others,
I could make out a solitary figure.
I knew in a moment it was my loving wife.
My best friend. My biggest supporter.
She looked up into the sky and flinched with me
As each floor blew its life out and surrendered to the flame.
The flames were close now.
I could feel them through my black boots.
I could hear them over the air hoses in my mask.
It would happen soon…
Still we stared at each other across the dark abyss.
The people around me were screaming.
Some were crying.
Others had resigned themselves to what was coming.
All wondered why or how this could happen to them…
But no one had any answers.
I struggled to see my Dearest Love below
Through the heavy curtain of smoke
That now filled the floor,
Hoping beyond hope that It would come soon.
As I lifted my left hand up and placed it against the
Hot, singing glass,
She raised hers into the sky toward me,
As if to say she understood, and would catch
My final kiss, if not my broken, burning body.
And a single tear streaked down my cheek
As the glass stopped its singing,
And blew me out into the
Dark, dark night.
And I woke up.